the (enabenatso)

It's a good idea to tell the person you are confronting exactly what you would like them to do instead of what they have done or currently are doing. You might think, "if they loved me, they would know what to do." That's the voice of resentment. Assume ignorance before malevolence. No one has a direct pipeline to your wants and needs - not even you. If you try to determine exactly what you want, you might find that it is more difficult than you think. The person oppressing you is likely no wiser than you, especially about you.