(delirious)

He'd been terrified of dying his entire life, and as much as he tried not to think about it, death was always in the back of his head, around every corner, and hovering on each horizon. He'd brushed shoulders with death on a few occasions, but in his carefree youth, it had almost seemed like an abstract, impossible thing to ever happen to him. But with each passing decade, he began to gauge the time he probably had left, and by his 40s - what he considered his halfway point at best - he had come to know just one thing: you will only get older. The next thing you know, you're looking back instead of forward.